Chocolate Chip Cookie Pie With Fluffy Chocolate Buttercream Frosting (low carb, gluten free, dairy free, no added sugar)

 

Ok, so technically another cookie recipe – WAIT I CAN EXPLAIN. While I have consistently maintained that cookies (PLURAL) are a tedious, high-maintenance endeavor, this is not the case when we are dealing with one gigantic cookie (SINGULAR).

LAZY LOOPHOLES.

More specifically, we’re talking about a cookie pie. Because pies are a…spring thing? (Are they?) And it’s spring now…?

You know what, no one was asking why. The why is obvious. Chocolate chip cookie pie. That is why. Also: fluffy whipped chocolate buttercream, because I have a whisk and am prepared to use it at all times.

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Because you are all subject to my personal whims, I aimed for my ideal cookie texture – dense, gooey, just this side of underbaked. I succeeded. Giddy with triumph, I decided that the only way this could be any better was with more chocolate. This would explain the buttercream.

Now if you know me, and I think you know me, things just keep GETTIN’ BETTERThis frosting-trimmed-chocolate-studded ~*~dream pie~*~ won’t be spiking any blood sugars or providing your daily dose of completely unnecessary trans fats.  That is not how we do things around here. What we do is the good things minus the bad things. It’s basic math. Look, I didn’t make the rules, Pythagoras.

 

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In this case, that means swapping out the carbs, glutens, and sugars for healthier alternatives, and losing none of the unbridled joy one experiences when eating a giant cookie. Pie. A giant cookie pie.

LET US WASTE NO MORE TIME.

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Chocolate Chip Cookie Pie With Fluffy Chocolate Buttercream Frosting (low carb, gluten free, dairy free, no added sugar)

Recipe adapted from Cafe Delites

Yields: Around 10-12 servings

Ingredients:

Cookie:
1/2 cup butter or dairy-free spread, softened
6 tbsp granulated sweetener, OR 1/4 cup granulated sweetener plus 2 tbsp sugar free brown sugar substitute
1 egg white, or three tbsp egg whites
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 cups almond flour
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
1/3 cup sugar free chocolate chips

Chocolate Buttercream:
1 cup powdered sweetener (or more if needed)
1/4 tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 cup butter or dairy-free spread, softened 
1-2 tbsp unsweetened almond milk
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/8 teaspoon sea salt

Instructions:

Preheat the oven to 350° and grease a 9″ pie pan.

In a large bowl, cream together softened butter and powdered sweetener. Add in the egg white, vanilla, almond flour, and salt and continue mixing until throughly combined.

Fold in chocolate chips, and then transfer to pie pan, smoothing with a spatula. Bake for 24-28 minutes, or until edges begin to brown and a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean (or mostly clean, if you prefer it a bit underbaked).

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To make the buttercream frosting, combine the powdered sweetener and cocoa powder. Beat the butter or dairy-free spread on medium speed until smooth and creamy.

Gradually add the sweetener/cocoa powder mixture with the almond milk. Stir in vanilla and salt, mixing again until smooth.

Decorate the cooled cookie pie with frosting however you please!

Nutritional Info (As calculated with dairy-free spread and brown sugar substitute):

chocolate chip cookie pie nutrition

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Classic Hamantaschen (low carb, gluten free, no added sugar, dairy free)

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With all the accidental Lenten festivities going on last week, it only seemed right to include some other theological treats in the fun. And with Purim right around the corner, what better than a makeover of the classic hamantaschen cookie?

Purim is a Jewish holiday that commemorates the saving of the Jewish people from Haman, a huge jerk that planned to murder all of them because he didn’t like one guy in particular. Hamantaschen are a traditional filled pastry folded into a triangle, generally thought to be referencing Haman’s three-pointed hat. Eating the hat of your enemies: APPROVED.

Now I have seen recipes for hamantaschen that put this one to shame – red velvet, brownie-filled, funfetti-cheesecake hamantaschen – but what’s the hurry? Build up to those, I say. Let’s start with the classics.

Well, classically, hamantaschen are filled with a variety of sweet fillings, like poppy seed (the oldest and most traditional variety), apricot, raspberry, raisins, fruit preserves, cherry, fig, chocolate, or even caramel or cheese.

Being a cheap lady of distinguished taste and discretion, I opted for apricot and raspberry as my fillings of choice, also because I already had a jar of each. (But THAT was because those two are the best fillings for anything, so really it all comes full circle.)

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I acknowledge that for someone who hates making cookies as much as I do, I am doing an EXCELLENT job at finding recipes to make them at every opportunity. That being said, these are pretty painless in terms of effort, even though they look so fancy. I promise! I’ve included pictures on how to fold them and everything!

With some simple substitutions for flour and sweetener, it was almost TOO easy to create an authentic hamantaschen minus all the wheaty-ness, sugary-ness, and gluten…ness. Plus, this is a cultural learning experience! This way, we all win.

Come, let us nosh.

Classic Hamantaschen (low carb, gluten free, no added sugar, dairy free)

Recipe adapted from All Day I Dream About Food

Yields: About 15 cookies

Ingredients:

2 cups almond flour
1/4 cup sweetener
1/4 tsp salt
1 large egg white, or about 2-3 tbsp egg white
2 1/2 tbsp butter or dairy-free spread, melted
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1/8 tsp stevia extract
1/4 cup sugar-free or reduced sugar raspberry preserves
1/4 cup sugar-free or reduced sugar apricot preserves

Instructions:

Preheat the oven to 325°F and line a large baking sheet with parchment paper.

Combine almond flour, sweetener, and salt in a medium bowl. Add egg white, vanilla and stevia extracts, and melted butter or dairy-free spread, and stir until dough comes together.

Always make a tiny version of the thing you are making when the opportunity presents itself.

Roll out dough onto a large piece of parchment paper. Using another large piece of parchment on top, roll out to 1/8 inch thick. Cut out rounds using (no smaller than) a 3 inch round cookie cutter.

Using a spatula or knife, very gently loosen rounds from parchment and transfer to prepared baking sheet.

Re-roll dough and cut out more rounds as necessary, until dough runs out. Spoon about 3/4 tsp of either raspberry or apricot preserves into the center of each circle.

Fold the dough in from three sides and firmly pinch the corners. The dough will be delicate, so don’t worry if you find yourself patching up little tears and cracks along the way.

Bake 12 to 15 minutes, until edges are just golden brown. Remove and let cool completely before attempting to transfer to any other plate/dish. Nosh away!

Nutritional Info (Calculated with dairy-free spread and sugar-free preserves):

hamantaschen nutrition

Cinnamon Crunch Tea Cookies (Low carb, gluten free, sugar free, dairy free)

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With Valentine’s Day coming up, there’s nothing more touching than the moment your special someone turns to you and says those three little words: “Eat this cookie.”

Because anyone that really loved you would definitely want you to eat these. That’s how you know the love is real.

And that’s what so great about Valentine’s Day. It doesn’t matter who your special someone is – fancy paramours, family, friends, your reflection in the mirror – we’re all allowed to embrace the gigantic amount of chocolate on sale for no reason in the middle of February. Plus: excuses to incorporate pink into food! I for one am SOLD.

Cinnamon (not chocolate for once) felt right for Valentine’s Day. Actually, cinnamon feels right for most holidays. And days. And mostly I just like putting cinnamon in everything.

Also in unrelated news, I recently had a coupon for $2 off clotted cream. And get this – my fridge appeared to have an empty space just about clotted cream jar size!! Complete coincidence.

Cinnamon (of the popular ‘Cassia’ variety) actually has a fairly long history of health benefits, too! To name a few:

Add that to a festive soiree of low carb nut flour, healthy fats, free from gluten, dairy (well, minus the clotted cream) and OF COURSE no added sugar, and we’ve got ourselves a winner!

HENCE: cinnamon crunch tea cookies. Crunchy on the outside, all sweet ‘n’ spicy – but soft and light on the inside. It practically melts in your mouth.  They taste fabulous as is, but then I went and glazed ’em. Honestly, because I wanted – no, NEEDED – pink somewhere. Add a spot of tea, a dab of jam, and a dollop of clotted cream (please do this if dairy doesn’t kill you), and you just guaranteed those three little words will lead to something even better. You know what I mean. Actually eating these cookies.

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Cinnamon Crunch Tea Cookies (Low carb, gluten free, sugar free, dairy free)

Recipe adapted from Mom’s Own Words and recommended by my friend Lindsay, who is a genius and a true visionary.

Yields: around 12-18 cookies (depending on how small or large you make them)

Ingredients: 

Cookies:
4 large egg whites, beaten until just frothy
2 cups almond flour or any nut flour (I used Honeyville walnut flour)
2/3 cup granulated sweetener (I used Swerve)
2 tsp baking powder
2 tsp vanilla extract

Filling/Topping:
2 tbsp granulated sweetener
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon (more or less depending on how ~spicy~ you like it!)
1 1/2 tsp sugar free brown sugar substitute, optional (I used this)

Glaze:
1 tbsp hot water or milk of choice, more or less depending on the consistency you want
1/4 tsp vanilla, or other extracts
1 /2 cup powdered sweetener
1-1 1/2 tbsp softened cream cheese, optional (I used this dairy free spread just for kicks)
Red food coloring, optional (IS IT REALLY OPTIONAL??)

(NOT) optional, for topping:
Clotted cream
Reduced sugar/sugar free jam or jelly of choice

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 375°F and line a sheet pan with parchment paper.

In a large bowl, combine all of the ingredients, and mix well to create a batter.

In a small bowl, whisk together filling ingredients. Sprinkle just under half of filling into batter and mix in, but do not fully incorporate, so that it remains streaky.

Use a tablespoon to drop 12-18 evenly spaced cookies on the lined pan. Sprinkle with remaining topping.

Bake for about 12-15 minutes until cookies begin to lightly brown and slightly bounce back at the touch.

For the glaze, whisk cream cheese (if using) and milk or water together until smooth. Beat in powdered sweetener and vanilla extract until combined. Add one or two drops of red food coloring for perfect pinkery! Pipe or spread over cooled cookies. Delicious served warm or cooled!

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Nutritional Info (As 15 servings, calculated with almond flour and glaze, and without toppings):

tea cookie nutrition

Raspberry Linzer Cookies AND Bars! (Low carb, sugar free, gluten free, dairy free)

 

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Cookies. So classic. So RELIABLE. Every time I need to make a dessert, I think, “Cookies. So classic and so reliable. Why do I never make cookies?”

And then I make the cookies and I’m like “ok THIS is why I don’t make cookies.”

Look. It’s nothing against cookies as an actual dessert. It’s everything against the rolling and cutting and re-rolling and re-cutting and getting the thickness just right and then having to eat all the extra ones you burned (well, that part’s ok) because you decided to guess what “1/4 of an inch” actually looked like.

(………burnt cookies not featured.)

But I wanted to be like a fancy Viennese pastry chef and make those pretty little Linzer cookies – or die klassischen Linzer Augen, AS IT WERE. I also knew this would take me approximately several hundred years to do because cookies are a high-maintenance dessert and I refuse to hear otherwise.

So for those in the “aggressively lazy” camp (this is a running theme you can always expect here), I thought: what if you made Linzer cookies but instead of cookies they were bars? Ideal! And THEN I discovered I wasn’t even the first to have thought of this! Super ideal!!

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But then I made both anyway, because it was just so exciting. I don’t think that actually saved me any time, in retrospect, but it meant there was a lot of sampling and I’m ok with that.

Simple and healthy ingredients, dairy-free adaptable, perfect for the holidays and also every other day. Oh, and did I mention? LESS THAN SIX INGREDIENTS. As I always say, lassen Sie es sich schmecken!

Recipes and nutritional info for both cookies and bars below:

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Raspberry Linzer Cookies (low carb, sugar free, gluten free, dairy free adaptable)

Recipe adapted from I Breathe I’m Hungry

Yields: About 32 cookies

Ingredients: 
Cookies:
1 cup granulated sweetener (I used Swerve)
4 cups blanched almond flour
3/4 cup butter or coconut oil, melted (Earth Balance Buttery Sticks or Melt Organic Spread would also work for dairy free)
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp almond extract

Filling:
1 cup sugar-free or reduced sugar raspberry preserves
1/8 tsp almond extract
1/4 tsp xanthan gum (optional, but helps filling set and hold together)
Powdered sweetener, for dusting

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350° F and line a baking sheet with parchment paper, or spray with oil.

Combine the sweetener, almond flour, butter/oil/spread, and extracts. Stir together until a crumbly but firm dough forms.

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Roll dough out onto parchment paper until about 1/4 inch thick.

Cut using a Linzer cookie cutter or a medium round or fluted cookie cutter, then using a smaller round, heart, or star shape to cut out the center (or honestly just buy this). Place on prepared baking sheet.

Bake for 8-12 minutes or until light golden brown around the edges.

Allow to cool to room temperature. Spread raspberry preserves filling on the flat side of each solid cookie. Dust the top of the cutout cookies with powdered sweetener, and press the flat sides together, with the raspberry preserves in the middle and the powdered sweetener on the top.

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The Ghost of Cookies Past.

And now for your bars, as promised:

Raspberry Linzer Bars (low carb, sugar free, gluten free, dairy free adaptable)

Recipe adapted from I Breathe I’m Hungry

Yields: Around 30 squares

Ingredients: 
Crust:
1 cup granulated sweetener (I used Swerve)
4 cups blanched almond flour
3/4 cup butter or coconut oil, melted (Earth Balance Buttery Sticks or Melt Organic Spread would also work for dairy free)
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp almond extract

Filling:
1 cup sugar-free or reduced sugar raspberry preserves
1/8 tsp almond extract
1/4 tsp xanthan gum (optional, but helps filling set)

 Directions:

Preheat oven to 350° F and line a 9×13 with parchment paper, or spray with oil.

Combine the sweetener, almond flour, butter/oil/spread, and extracts. Stir together until a crumbly but firm dough forms. Press about 2/3 of the dough into the pan.

In a separate bowl, combine the raspberry preserves, almond extract, and xanthan gum (if using).

Spread the preserves mixture evenly over the crust, and then crumble the remaining crust mixture over the top of the preserves layer.

Bake in a preheated oven at 350°F for 28 – 30 minutes or until golden brown and firm.

 

Remove from the oven and cool completely before cutting into 2 inch squares. Voila!

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Nutritional Info:

As calculated with sugar free raspberry preserves:

linzer bar nutrition info

 

Seasonal Baking Extravaganza – A Preview of Upcoming Healthy/Low-Carb Recipes!

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Could anything be more exciting?! Let me explain: a veritable smörgåsbord of healthy delights awaits you in short order. An extravaganza!

 

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The aforementioned smörgåsbord and/or extravaganza.

I’ve only just now emerged from the colossal heap of disposable baking pans burying my kitchen. I feel like an avalanche survivor. And with me, I bring a trove of seasonal recipes for everyone to enjoy over the holiday, New Years, and beyond!

If you’re looking for some healthy low-carb eatin’, this lady’s got you covered. Blondies, bars ‘n’ buttercreams, tell ya what. Keep an eye out for recipes coming out over the next few weeks!

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Ah, the textures of the season.

Take 1: Flourless Cinnamon Almond Butter Cookies

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I had one job. And that was to post a recipe containing chia seeds.

This recipe does not contain any chia seeds at all. And for that I would like to apologize to my sister, whose sole request was that I post a recipe with chia seeds in it. ONE JOB.

So THIS (the sentence you are reading RIGHT NOW) is my promise to post many chia seeded delights in the future. You heard it here first!!

At least I can say that this recipe was truly inspired. Inspired by me finding myself with three jars of almond butter. Two of them are Costco sized. Yes. You get it.

So what we got here is a crispy-soft, almond buttery, cinnamon-laced tea cookie with hints of vanilla. And in case that sounded too enticing, they are also very ugly. Just, kinda…homely lookin’ for a cookie. :| But let’s not focus on what they aren’t. These cookies are:

  • grain-free/flourless
  • gluten-free
  • low sugar/carb
  • full of fiber and healthy fats (do I sound like Women’s Health right now???)
  • very super easy and quick to make

So let’s go places:

Flourless Cinnamon Almond Butter Cookies

Recipe adapted from Pies and Plots
Yields: ~14 cookies

Ingredients: 

1 cup/8 oz. jar almond butter (I actually used slightly less since I had already eaten some uhhh)
2/3 cup sweetener  (I used ZSweet)
1 packet stevia (optional)
1 egg white
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
1 tsp cinnamon
Walden Farms chocolate dip for topping (very optional. and don’t try and be clever and stir some into the batter like I did IT DOESN’T BAKE WELL)

Directions:

Our cast of characters.

Our cast of characters.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Line a baking sheet with parchment or nonstick spray.

Stir together all ingredients until fully combined.

Using a tablespoon, scoop batter onto prepared baking sheet. These are pretty soft due to the almond butter, so they begin to spread right away. The sooner into the oven the better!

Please note: these are not hamburger sliders they are a dessert and I'm sorry.

Please note: these are not hamburger sliders they are cookies and I’m sorry.

Bake for about 15-18 minutes until cookies have spread and set on the tops. Cookies will still be very soft and molten in the centers, but they harden  as they cool, so do not overbake. Like I did.

These cookies: apparently fresh off the grill.

These cookies: apparently fresh off the grill.

Hilarious. Also make sure you use a big enough cookie sheet. LEARN FROM MEEEEEE

I kept these in an airtight container at room temperature for about a week, and they stayed fancy fresh. I don’t see why you couldn’t freeze them as well.

Nutritional Info:

Calculated with ZSweet and stevia. Also reflects slightly less than 1 cup almond butter.
Almond Cookie NutritionLabel

I'm sorry these are not charmingly wrapped up in twine and brown paper with sprigs of pine nearby.

I’m sorry these are not charmingly wrapped up in twine and brown paper with sprigs of pine nearby.

Aeriel shot!!!Aerial shot!!!

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